388. Throw Snowballs At Your Negative Mindset

On this episode, Nellie will be chatting about the power of mindset and manifestation and throwing snowballs at your negative mindset! Are you ready? Let's jump right in!

We will touch on:

• The power of mindset and manifestation.
• Managing negative thoughts and maintaining a positive mindset. 
• Mindset and navigating adversity.
• Managing emotions and thoughts for inner peace.

Shout out to Rebecca Hallbach Paciorek for sponsoring this very important episode!!!!
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Transcript

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I was sitting waiting for Boone to make sure that he was asleep before I went to record this very, very, very, very important episode of throwing snowballs at your negative mindset, you cannot run away from a negative mindset because you are stuck with you for the rest of your life. And your negative mindset is with you everywhere you go, unless you choose differently. And I think this is a really, really important episode because as I was sitting waiting for Boone to go to sleep, I just like intuitively sat there, I was like, What do I need to talk about. And I really love to not pre plan these episodes too much. Because I want to feel passionate about them. Like I want to genuinely be excited about them. And so as I was sitting there, waiting, it was like this flood of this is what you get to talk about. So there's at least one human out there needing this information. And they may not even know it, maybe you know who they are, and you need to send this episode to them. Because sharing is caring. So we'll just Elise go ahead and, and do that. Because typically, if you have a negative mindset, you are so stuck in your stories, that you can't even hear it, you don't even recognize it. And so people around you that are not in a negative mindset, or at least they're not in your negative mindset. So they may, they may have their own thing, but they may be able to see it so much clearer. If you've ever watched the Netflix series, Stranger Things, I really love to explain the upside down. So if you haven't watched the supernatural show Stranger Things in that show, some of them get pulled into the upside down. And there is like, like, there's like it's a different universe, essentially. And people can hear each other, but they can't get through to the other universe. And like that's what a negative mindset can start to do. It can pull you into the upside down, it can keep you in the upside down. And what you start to believe, is really what you start to attract. Like, I really deeply believe that to my core, because a simple practical example is when you go car shopping, right? Have you ever been car shopping, and then you start to see that car everywhere? It's because you told your brain that is having so much go on all day, even when you're sleeping, your brain is still working, your subconscious is still working, right? And so when you go car shopping, you start to see that car everywhere this happened with my jeep years ago. I never saw a Jeep never saw a Jeep like I saw a jeep, but I didn't see a jeep. Right. And this is like your negative positive mindset example. So the jeeps were still on the road. But until I told my brain, I want a Jeep. This is important to me. Wouldn't you know it? I started seeing Jeeps everywhere. Wouldn't you know what it's like, oh, my gosh, this is a sign and like, if you don't know anything, if you don't know things about the Jeep, community, everyone waves to each other. You only times that wave a day. Like it's still to this day. I see Jeeps all day, every day, it blows my freaking mind. And it's because I've continued to say, brain. Jeeps are important to me, right brain keep seeing them keep waving to the jeeps, right? It's a part of my day to day now. And so your negative mindset if we are not careful, can start to do this in a negative way. So this can work for positive things and negative things. And so there's somebody that needs to hear this, and please share it with them because maybe this will be the start of like, okay, they shared this with me. Maybe it's me, maybe I'm the problem, right? And you actually being the problem is actually a really good thing. So stick with me if somebody shared this with you. It's because they love you. If you popped on maybe there's a reason why. And here's the here's the cool part about it. I am probably one of the happiest people I know. Like I've just always been that way. I'm a very naturally optimistic to my core, happy go lucky person. And I still struggle with mental health. I still struggle with negativity within me. And so I have really had to work on pulling in all the tools and resources As over the years, because I'm human just like you, I have a set of beliefs that some things I've been undoing. And so I think it's just so important to acknowledge that of like, I am not talking at you, I am so much lovingly talking with you. Like, I always, always, always want to be your BFF. And I don't want to go too far without giving a amazing shout out to Rebecca, which is the CEO and the heartbeat, behind authors allies, she is on a deep mission to help authors get their books out to the world, and be seen and heard and supported. So that way, all of that hard work does not go to waste. And so please, please, please check out Rebecca, wherever you're watching or listening to this episode. She's amazing, and truly has a heart of gold and loves authors like that girl. She was so passionate about authors it, I love it so much. And that's how it should be. So Rebecca, thank you so much for sponsoring this episode, if you want to sponsor an episode, they're just $25 I shout out your business, what you're up to nonprofit, whatever you're passionate about. And I so appreciate it. This is what's really helping us build a service based business that gives back in so many deep ways. So as you continue to see us grow the wealthy mama movement, our mission is to make education for busy mamas so affordable, that moms can feel amazing, grow a business online, around their family, build financial freedom, build time freedom, and feel amazing during the whole process. And what I see from so many mamas is, it's not always easy to financially invest in education, because they're either staying home with their kids, they're working a day job, they may have clients, like there's a lot of balls in the air. And so we just want to eliminate all barriers for women, for women, whether they have a business already or don't, and create the most affordable education online for women, and meet them where they're at more and more and more. And our sponsors are helping us to do that. So that way, everything is super affordable. So thank you, thank you, thank you. And if you want to be a sponsor of any shape, or form, just reach out and we would love to support you. We do make sure that all of our sponsors are like mission aligned, and support women support moms, that's very, very important to me. So if moms are your audience, this is a great spot for you. And we so appreciate your consideration. All right, so let's get back to it. So your negative mindset, again, I struggle with this too, we are talking together, we are BFFs here, and I want to help you navigate through it, or I want to help somebody that you love that you shared this with like I want to help that person through it as well. Because your quality of life is so important. And I feel like a lot of times when we're in survival survival mode, we make different decisions. And that is normal. But in order to get from survival mode to you're thriving, you're happy you're loving your life you have, you know, when you do have negative thoughts, you know how to like navigate through them. And so to get you out of the upside down, like something does have to happen. It's not just magically want to one day going to change. And I think it's so important to also acknowledge life is always gonna life. Just this week alone, just this week, we're not even. We're on Wednesday when I'm recording this episode. So we're not even. We're not at the end of the week yet. Our basement has flooded. I have a kid with pinkeye What else has gone on? I drove home last night in the snow from a client. And that was 90 minutes and I was literally like grabbing the wheel. I just I'm a Graham. I'm a grandma. I do not love driving in darkness or nasty conditions. I'm the girl on the road that's driving very slow in the slow lane. Sometimes even with my hazards on sometimes I'll even pull over. I get a lot of anxiety around it. It's it. I'm a grandma, I'm a grandma. But yeah, so we're only on Wednesday and that's already what the week has been through pinkeye through driving home in the snow and the flood. I have kept such eight are regulated. Like energy and mindset that I am freaking proud. Like I'm just gonna like shout myself out for a second because all like it's easy to have a positive mindset when you're getting great quality sleep when your kids are getting sleep when your clients are happy or your boss is happy. Right, like, money's coming in, like you're nailing your budget, like the house is all cleaned. Like when life is feeling pretty put together as close to perfect as possible, or you're on vacation or any of those things. It's easy to have a positive mindset, like, let's just be real, let's just be real. It's easy to have a positive mindset when everything for the most part is going in your favor and working. And that we do want that don't get me wrong, like, yes, please, more and more and more for everyone listening. And also, to pretend that things are never gonna go wrong, is not fair. Like it's not fair to you. It's not fair to your mindset. And so when our basement flooded, I have to tell you this story, because I think it's so hilarious. I really like I laugh at myself. So we we noticed, like the layer of water in our basement a couple of nights ago. And when I say we noticed my six year old noticed. So Emma and I were downstairs in the basement together. I was down there to just her and I and I was down there packing up a few things for my client because I was going to organize her office. I'm down there, I'm going up and down the stairs and was following me. I'm surprised she's not sitting with me right now. She must be asleep with her dad. But I was going up and down the stairs, packing everything completely oblivious to my right of where the flood was oblivious. So I'm upstairs and Emma goes, Mom, there's water. And I'm like, What do you mean, there's water. And she goes, come look. She's the hero. Like, she gets, you know, employee of the month at the Corbeau house or like, she's the one that discovered it. My ADHD brain was so blind to what was happening. I was like a tunnel vision on a mission. Like we gave her so much praise because like, one we leave for Disney very soon, I am so grateful that it didn't happen when we were in Disney because we must have just caught it because based on like the container that we like, covered where the leak was happening, it filled up so fast. So I am grateful that it didn't happen, we were gone. And I'm grateful that Emma caught it because I haven't been down the basement ever since. So who knows how long that could have been like, we don't go in the basement often. So I'm grateful that I had my client that I needed to pack up for. And I'm grateful for Emma. So even through all of that we're like wiping up all of the water. We're all giggling, like, your mindset, like a good test on how strong your mindset is, is how you do in times of adversity. And like doesn't mean that you have to be perfectly there's still always going to be a time and a place to cry to be frustrated. And also how you navigate through it is a real good test of how strong your mindset is. And I think that if you answer and you're like, oh, shit, okay, I snapped at, you know, my significant other yesterday, or my kids, you're human, it happens at but if you can start to build some recent situations that were high stress that were overwhelming and like you lashed out and or privately, you had really negative self self deprecating mean thoughts that you would like, be so embarrassed to say out loud, because it's not just what we say. It's what we think like mindset is everything connected together like we want. We want your whole brain on board with your heart and, and then working together. I'm super like a big advocate for you being passionate about what you're doing, you being happy and fulfilled. And also, I know we've got to get your brain on board and your whole brain. And most of your brain is subconscious thoughts, meaning it's happening without you fully, like knowing that it's happening based on all of your conditioning based on programming based on beliefs based on habits, right, that autopilot. So your brain is like a software. And so sometimes software is not working the best and it needs an update, right? So it could be time for an update. And I always think there's room to grow and have the latest greatest update for sure. But it won't start until somebody admits that like yeah, I could really work on like this could really be an area of growth for me. And again, when you're the problem you're also the solution. And there is nothing wrong with admitting that there's room for growth, there's room for improvement, because then we can do something about it. And so an experiment that I would love for you to do is one recall in the last two weeks, that's an easy, you know, short timeframe. Like in the last two weeks, there's probably been something life happening, right? How did you respond? How did you react? What did you say? What did you feel? How did you think? And what did we do after, right? Like, when people are in the upside down, they and like, the negativity is so strong, typically, one little thing will derail them, right? Like that flood, we could have been fighting at each other and yelling and screaming, and like, you know, stomping our feet and all of the things and like adversity is gonna happen, confrontation is gonna happen. But again, it's always how we like come to the challenge. And I just, I just saw a video that somebody shared, and she, she said, that she doesn't anticipate the bad things happening, she just knows that she's going to navigate through them, and that it's going to be okay. And I was like, Oh, my gosh, I love that. Like, yes, that's how I feel like, I'm not worried about it, I'm not stressed about it, I'm not going to let it ruin my day. A big, big thing I keep saying to myself That's really supported me recently is worrying about something, shaming myself about something lashing out about something yelling, screaming, whatever, maybe like anything negative, it's not really going to help anyways, like worrying about money is not going to get you more money. Shaming yourself about your body is not going to get you a six pack. Like, those aren't actual helpful feelings. If you're feeling mad or frustrated, like it can be healthy to be there for a second, and then go through the other emotions on the emotional wheel. So there's nothing wrong with you know, certain types of emotions. But there's a difference between emotions. And like you lashing out like the that is allowing you to act in the emotion versus feeling the emotion and working through the emotion. So it's like, really allowing our emotions to to be our guide of like, okay, I'm feeling a certain way. And again, it's like protocols, I've talked a lot about protocols. So if you know, you are an emotional eater, right, you could start to create a protocol around when you're feeling like you want to motional Lee, and that doesn't serve you and you want to shift, then you could start to create a protocol around, okay, when I'm feeling the urge to emotionally eat, instead, I'm going to do blink, that's your new protocol. Or maybe you find yourself, you know, lashing out at your kids or saying a certain thing when you like, look in the mirror, you can start to swap out these habits, like they've become habits when you really think about them, like, and there's always going to be deeper rooted things depending on what's going on. But we can start with more of the surface level stuff first, and and get some of that off, right, like get some of that weight off. So, like I said, the biggest thing of me, like a, like POV Point of View, Show, like, do I really want to waste my time worrying about this, because whether it's happened or not, or beating myself up about something like it's not going to make the situation better. And time is so precious, the and and on top of time, the worry the shame that stress does a lot of permanent damage to your body, like a lot. And so when we, when we do those things, it's not helping us get to the result that we truly desire whenever it is, and it is harming ourselves. It is like permanently hurting you. And and then you that energy starts to spill over to other people around you because we are the sum of the people we surround ourselves with and not just on in our home. But our workplaces, our social medias, right like people that you walk by, like we all are energetic beings. And so just really us being responsible for us can be massive, and taking it really really seriously and like this is what creates quality of life. Life, like, truly, you can be in the gym so many times a week, but if we're continuing to live in such an anxious, irritable, stressed our body, it's gonna, it's gonna affect you and like it's gonna, it's gonna hold you back in so many ways. And so it's like just releasing that and saying like, and that's what I've just been saying to myself, as I've been navigating different things day to day big and small. I'm like, Okay, if I worry about this, it's not going to help me if I stress about this not gonna help me. If I shame myself about this. Like, it's a really like, it's just helped kind of be a check in point for me of like, keeping me in check, like, Okay, do you really want to spend more and more time worrying about this. And so it's really helped me detach from whatever's going on big and small, and just find so much inner peace, that I want so many other people to feel. And so that's been a really great tool for me as I've been navigating things. Because when you're running a business, you've got two kids, you're managing a household, like, there's going to be laundry, there's going to be dishes, there's going to be a kid that sick, right? Sometimes there's going to be a flood, this is actually our first her first flood. And I'm glad we caught it. So worrying about things, stressing about them. Shaming yourself having even negative thoughts, even if it if it doesn't even, like, come out of your mouth, but you think it, I don't want you to beat yourself up about it, because you're still a human. However, even negative thoughts become such a habit. Even if you never say them out loud, it becomes a habit. And so we get to slowly create those protocols of like, okay, when I even think this thing, even if it never comes, if I never say it out loud, what's gonna be the new protocol. And that way, even when you do think the thing, you can be like, No, dang it, okay. I'm not going to shame myself. But now I have a protocol. And then you'll do the protocol. And it doesn't get to be upon like, it shouldn't be, I think it shouldn't be a punishment. Like, the protocol shouldn't be a punishment, like, so a protocol, if you have like a negative thought, and you're like, Okay, dang it, I had the thought, I'm human, I'm gonna acknowledge that I'm a human. And now I'm going to lean into the protocol, the lean into the protocol may be a journal exercise, what was the thought, let's get it out. Maybe it's a broken record, that you keep saying, let's go to therapy for for the thought. Because there's always a y under the Y under the Y under the Y under the Y. And there's more, right? When you have a thought. And if we don't address it, the thought will keep coming back around, like a broken record, right? No matter what it is. So you actually writing it down and be like, Okay, I want to work through this. And you not having to do it alone can be so helpful. Like you can get such a quick break through. Like I was on a call with two clients today. And like we were doing this activity, like very similar, it wasn't like therapy based, it was more business based, but it was like, Okay, let's work through this. Let's talk this out. And we were able to like really create a transformation create a breakthrough within an hour. And so it can be really helpful to get out of the upside down and start to create change to shift and it will feel slow in the beginning but it will start to become this snowball. So the more you throw snowballs at your negative mindset at your beliefs. This is not you okay? You did not you weren't born into this world with all of that negativity, like truly like trauma can be passed down from birth however, everything that you believe subconsciously the things that you say a lot of them are our through our life, right like as we're growing up and navigating adulthood, like they just keep snowballing and, and building and building and building and it can just feel like there's no way out. And as I've interacted with different people, I have realized that this is a privilege like to work on your mindset and to have that peace, that inner peace and have that freedom. It is a privilege. And also it is something that everyone One can work on and everyone's journey will look different. Some may be more in therapy, some may be more, you know, we're they're working through it on their own. If you need any resources, please, please, please reach out. Again, I'm your BFF here cheering you on. But like the visualization of the snowball, and it not being you just sit with that for a second, because as you've gone through life, the snowball has gotten so big, right. But here's the cool part, the more we meaning you throw snowballs at the big, big, big snowball of all of the negativity, we can start to chip out, chip at it and break it down. And it's going to start melting and melting and melting and melting. Snow doesn't stay forever on the ground. Right? It goes away. And so how we can speed up the process and take the power back is we start throwing snowballs at it with all the love and all of the positivity all of the protocols, all the support around you. And this is really what I have done. Even as mostly in the past seven years, like right before I got pregnant with Emma is when I worked. So probably like eight years technically. But I really started going on this personal growth journey. And it's so in like, that's why I started this episode with I didn't know like I again, I've been a very naturally happy person. And so I didn't know I needed to work on so many things. And so you're like you're living life and you're just like, Okay, I guess this is as good as it gets. And then my my whole world was opened up when I started working on personal development and reading books and going to conferences and buying courses. And it's just has been that beautiful snowball like the positive snowball. So I know that this is possible for everyone that wants it that wants to feel feel that true inner peace, it takes time, it takes effort, it takes love and support, but it's so doable for anyone that desires it. So send this to a friend that you know could benefit from it. If somebody did send this to you know that they love you so much. Like they took their precious time to be like, I see the good in this human and I want them to, to grow and thrive and live their amazing life quality life. We always put so much emphasis on quality of life when you retire. But whether you have a business or not, I feel like quality of life can be now and it's no one's responsibility. It is yours other people can add to it. But like that inner peace, that inner happiness, that inner joy, that inner everything, it's not a later thing, it gets to be a right now thing. And it's not a when I make this much money or when I lose this way or when I my business gets this big or when I pay off debt. Like if we're always chasing outside sources, and delaying and delaying and delaying it as humans will keep delaying it. Like you'll lose the weight and you're like oh, okay, now it's something else. So like you actually just starting to love yourself more right now. And then still Yes, pursuing any and all of those things. Fantastic. But like, you get to start feeling those feelings. Now. As you're on the pursuit of happiness, I can't think of a better way to end this episode. So I'm so excited for you love to hear from you. If there's an episode that you would benefit, please don't hesitate to reach out and just like let me know and say hey, would you be willing to talk about this topic? I do not take any more one on one clients. So as we're growing all of our educational programs, thanks to our sponsors, and thanks to everyone that's buying our educational products and coming into our passive income school. This is the direction that I'm taking wealthy mama movement. And although it is so hard to say no to people one on one, you can totally request an episode and it's still a way for me to deeply support you and just a different way. So I love you throw as many snowballs as you can and do not give up. You've got this you deserve such a quality based life and that feel that inner peace and you can create it more and more and more